I Must Not Tell Lies
by rosie3107
Summary: My thoughts on what could have happened if Sirius had found out about Harry's detentions with Umbridge. Now featuring the Weasley Twins and crazy house elves.
1. I must not tell lies

A/N- This is my first fan fiction so please go easy on me. I am open to any comments and constructive criticism but please no flames.

Disclaimer- I do not own any of the characters in this story. (though I would love to own Remus.)

A/N- This chapter has been slightly altered so if you have already read it you might want to read it again.

**'I must not tell lies'**

Harry had just finished yet another 'detention' with Umbridge, if they could even be called detentions, they were more like being tortured for 2 hours or more. His hand was still bleeding quite freely due to the amount of times he had carved the words 'I must not tell lies' into the back of his hand. Harry sighed as he realized that it would probably scar now and he would be stuck with the words forever.

He perked up though at the thought of going to Grimmauld Place the next day, Albus Dumbledore had given him, Hermione and all the the Weasley children at hogwarts permission to spend the weekend there and return to hogwarts sunday night. Even though Harry really didn't like Grimmauld Place he couldn't wait to see Sirius again, he hated the thought of his godfather locked up in that miserable house with only Kreacher the psychotic house-elf for company.

Yes, Harry thought, I'm definitely looking forward to tomorrow and not even Umbridge can get me down.

The next day Harry and his friends arrived at Grimmauld Place early in the morning in order to spend as much time as possible with Sirius. Harry grinned as he saw his godfather waiting for them in the kitchen along with their ex-professor Remus Lupin.

"Hey Sirius, professor Lupin," Harry greeted, while receiving a warm hug from Sirius.

"Please Harry, call me Remus, I'm not your professor anymore," Remus smiled kindly.

"Oh okay pro...Remus, sorry it's just habit I guess," replied Harry. The Weasley children and Hermione left to go greet Molly and Arthur in the next room and Remus followed after them with a small wave to Harry which was returned. Leaving Harry and Sirius alone in the kitchen.

"So kiddo, how have you been?, got into any trouble lately?, land any detentions?, turned Snapes hair pink?" Sirius asked with a grin, only half joking.

"I'm doing okay but even though I'm trying _not_ to get any detentions, I seem to get loads from Umbridge anyway!"

"Umbridge, yeah I've heard about her, hates half-breeds doesn't she?, yeah she's a nasty piece of work, what does she give you detention for?"

"I apparently keep 'telling lies' about Voldemort returning, she doesn't believe me!" replied Harry, raising his voice slightly in anger.

"What does she have you doing in these detentions then?" Sirius asked.

"Oh, erm.. just.. you know.. lines, not much really," Harry replied somewhat nervously.

"What do you have to write?"

"I must not tell lies..."

"_Just _lines Harry, you sure?"

"erm... yep, just lines.. nothing else..."

The next day Sirius, Harry and Remus were sat around the table eating breakfast. Everyone else was still in bed snoring softly or in Ron's case loud enough to wake the dead. As Harry reached across the table to get a piece of toast from the plate in the middle, the light from the window fell onto his hand causing the scar on the back of his hand to briefly light up. Remus, who was sitting across from Harry, noticed this and immediately reached out to grab Harry's wrist preventing him from pulling his hand back.

"what's this?" Remus asked quietly, acting calm.

"Oh, er... it's nothing, just a cut," Harry replied, trying to pull his hand back to cover up the words.

"A cut in the shape of the words 'I must not tell lies'?" Remus asked, raising one eyebrow and keeping a firm hold of Harry's wrist.

"WHAT?!" shouted Sirius leaning forward to get a look at Harry's hand.

"Harry, how did you get this?" Remus asked quietly.

"Detention..." mumbled Harry figuring he might as well tell them since he couldn't see a way of avoiding it.

"Detention..." repeated Sirius thoughtfully, then a look of understanding came across his face, "detention!, Harry you said that Umbridge was giving you lines! not cutting you hand open!!"

"Yeah well, technically it is lines, I'm just writing them in my own blood," said Harry.

"A blood quill, thats what it is isn't it?!" said Remus looking a bit pale.

"Yeah..." mumbled Harry.

"A BLOOD QUILL!, but...but that's ILLEGAL!" shouted Sirius, clearly outraged.

"Yes it is, we should report it to the ministry," said Remus.

"MINISTRY!!, no way, she'll just get a warning, I doubt the minister will even care!, NO! I'm gonna kill that bitch!" roared Sirius.

"NO!, Sirius please, that's what she wants, it doesn't matter, I can handle it fine by myself, you don't need to get involved!" Harry shouted desperately.

"He's right Sirius, you don't need to get involved, I'll just tell Dumbledore and..."

"NO!, you cant tell _anyone_, that's what she wants and besides, telling someone will probably just get you _and _me in trouble, it's best just to leave it alone," Harry reasoned.

"But Harry, that woman's _torturing_ you! she needs to be stopped!" Sirius cried with Remus nodding in the background obviously agreeing with Sirius.

"Don't you get it? If you say something the ministry would probably just turn it around saying that I'm obviously unstable and cutting the words into my hand is my way of gaining attention! Umbridge would never admit to it! and what evidence it there? none! it's just my word against hers and who do you think the ministry is going to believe?" Harry explained.

Remus sighed in defeat and nodded his head, "as much as I hate it and think it unfair, what Harry said is true Sirius, at the moment the ministry is of the opinion that Harry is just an 'attention seeking liar' they would never believe him if he told the ministry what was happening."

"Damn it! it's not fair, but we can't just do _nothing, _there must be something we can do!" pleaded Sirius.

"No Sirius, please you've got to promise not to do _anything_ to Umbridge." Harry begged desperately.

"Fine, I promise." mumbled Sirius while secretly crossing his fingers behind his back.

"I'm afraid the best we can do is give Harry a potion for the pain and to try and lessen the scarring," Remus said tiredly, he stood up and walked over to a cabinet filled with various vials and rummaged through them until he found what he was looking for, before returning to his seat at the table. "There you go Harry just rub a bit of this on your hand and it will ease the pain and hopefully minimize the scarring." Remus said, passing the jar to Harry.

"Thanks Remus."

Later that day, just before Harry and his friends' return to Hogwarts, Sirius pulled Harry aside for a last minute chat. "Look Harry, I know there's not much I can do but if you _ever_ need me for _an__y _reason, I'm just a firecall away, and if you can't contact me directly try owling Remus and he will pass it on to me." Sirius told Harry quietly.

"Okay, thanks Sirius." Harry replied smiling warmly.

"No problem kiddo, take care of yourself." Sirius said while ruffling up Harry's already messy mop of hair. "I will, you too Sirius, be careful!" Said Harry frantically trying to smooth down his hair. Harry gave Sirius one last quick hug before turning and disappearing through the floo with a shout of "Hogwarts."

**TBC...**

A/N- This story was originally a one-shot but I have had a few requests to extend it so I have wrote Chapter 2: Sirius' Revenge.


	2. Sirius' Revenge

**Sirius' Revenge**

Sirius was sat in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place slowly sipping a cup of tea while contemplating what horrible things he could inflict on Umbridge in repayment for her torturing of Harry, his only godson.

What he really wanted to do was painfully torture her before slowly killing her but he didn't want to become a murderer or risk going back to Azkaban so he would have to settle for something a little less extreme. There was also of course the issue of him being a wanted criminal which meant that whatever he did is identity would have to be kept secret.

Sirius would have liked to ask Remus for ideas as he had always been the brains of the Marauders and would probably have some great revenge ideas. Unfortunately Remus would probably disagree with his plan on getting revenge on Umbridge because as well as been the smart one he was also the sensible one and he wouldn't think it right to be getting personal revenge on Umbridge.

Suddenly an evil grin spread over Sirius' face, he knew the perfect people to help him, a certain pair of red-headed weasley's.

* * *

Everyone was gathered in the great hall for dinner when a large owl swooped in and landed right in front of Fred and George Weasley.

Fred quickly took the letter off of the waiting owls leg and positioned the parchment so that his brother could read it at the same time.

_Dear fellow pranksters,_

at this both Fred and George turned to each other and grinned.

_I am writing because I am in need of some assistance of the pranking type. I recently became aware that my godson has been repeatedly receiving detentions with Umbridge where he is forced to carve his own hand open._

Fred and Georges eyes widened as they read what Umbridge had Harry doing in his 'detentions'.

_I would be eternally grateful if you could help me prank Umbridge and make her life a living hell as I am unable to do anything directly myself. Please reply A.S.A.P. _

_Snuffles_

Fred quickly turned the paper over and scribbled a reply saying that of course he could rely on their help with getting revenge on Umbridge and that it would be their pleasure.

* * *

The next day Fred and George received another letter from Sirius at breakfast thanking them for their willingness to help and giving them some ideas. They had decided to start off small and gradually build up the pranks so they became more and more extreme.

The first thing they did was break into Umbridge's office and turn all of her pink things black and make her 'precious' cat plates be spiders instead. They also planted real live spiders in her desk draws and hit her chair with a sticking charm. One last thing they did before leaving was throwing in dung bombs that would automatically let off as soon as Umbridge walked through the door.

Umbridge's scream was heard all over Hogwarts as she opened her office door. She spent all day trying to reverse the damage but had no luck as everything had a charm on to stop them from being reversed and every time she tried to vanish the spiders they multiplied until her office was full up with spiders and she was forced to leave her room screaming all the while.

Sirius laughed heartily when he received the letter detailing what had happened from the Weasley twins and he settled down to plan more means of revenge ginning evilly all the time.

* * *

For two weeks Umbridge was repeatedly tortured with various pranks courtesy of the Weasley twins and Sirius. Dung bombs that followed her around, changing her robes to look like Snape's, things 'mysteriously' disappearing from her office and having house-elf's follow her around asking "would Miss Toad like some clean underwear to wear on her head?" were only a few of the things that happened to her.(the last idea had been George's and all he had to do was ask Dobby to tell all the house-elf's to call Umbridge Miss Toad and ask her embarrassing questions.)

By the end of the two weeks Umbridge was a nervous wreck and no longer gave Harry detentions as most of the pranks had occurred during that time and she was too afraid to risk it. When Sirius' heard this he was extremely happy that Harry no longer had to endure the horrible torture sessions he received from Umbridge anymore.

Fred and George continued to play minor pranks on Umbridge just to keep her on edge and prevent her from giving any detentions to Harry or anyone else.

Harry suspected that Sirius had a hand in all of the pranking that had suddenly started just days after he had told Sirius about the 'detentions' but he never said anything, secretly grateful that he had such a great godfather looking out for him. Besides it wasn't as if he didn't want Umbridge to get pranked, it was very amusing to watch her run screaming from various parts of the castle.

'Yes' Harry thought, this year is definitely looking up.

**The End**

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